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BigPerv's Media Day Quotes

Coach Young

-We have a very talented team this year.  Take a look at those asses and the way they shake their pom-poms, God they are hot.

-Oh yes it was a coup to get Harrison, and as far as I can tell, he hates it here in Marlette.  That should work out great for us when someone tries to bump him off the line.

-Yes losing Favre is a big loss.  But we picked up another one of those 'athletic' QBs, lord knows they don't have the brains, but they sure can run and throw.  And I'm sure not going to start that Carr fella.

-Who? Ditzy? Oh Deezy... yeah I know we've never had great luck facing him, so maybe this time we'll get him from behind, because from what I've heard that is the way he likes it.

Marvin Harrison

-I fucking hate this town.  I'm just going to play out my contract and get out.

-Fuck no I'm not going to help this team win !

-Well yeah, being on a team coached by Coach Young does have it's benefits, but this town sucks my balls... speaking of that, I have to get to the lock room.

Mike Vanderjagt

-I like it here. I have a female ball holder. Pardon? Yes, she would be the first female to hold my balls for me.

-Ahh yes, I have been trying to get her to wash my balls more often then I had the backup QBs.

-No, I don't think David is to upset, in fact I believe she has been helping him with his ball control.

Hines Ward

-Right I know I said I was going to stay put last year.  But Coach split so, so did I. Plus have you met that broken down old man they call a 'coach'?

-Look, I played for three busters.  This Cat seems alright.  By the way our room service sucks... in the good way.

-I'm here because I want to get out of the first round for once.

-Yeah I heard Harrison isn't happy with this place, but neither am I.  That's why I don't talk to the tricks when I'm done with them.

Charles Rogers

-No this year I'm playing the full year.

-No really

-Yes, I'll be fine, no I don't want any milk.

Drew Wahlroos

-*Mumble*

Daunte Culpepper

-Coach seems like a good guy, I know this franchise has a history of being sexist and racist.  But I really think that was all taken out of context.

-I plan on having a 5000 yard year.  I'd say about 40 TD's and maybe 5 ints... what?  Yes, I'm realistic that's why I said 5 ints.

-He said what?? 'Athletic' ... Throw... run... sonofabitch!

David Carr

-Of course I wish Daunte all the luck, just today, I told him to go out there and break a leg.

-Controversy over Coach Young making a racist comment? Is that news?

-Controversy over Trixi holding Mike's balls?  No not at all, in fact I think she's a great girl.  In fact I think she's taken on a lot here, but as long as she can just suck it up, grin, and bare it, I think we'll get along just fine.


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